Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Just for Today by Jaye Lewis


Hello friends,

This is my second month on Lantus insulin. I take it once a day, and with my doctor’s advice, I am raising my dosage by one unit per day, until my fasting blood sugar is down to 100. It goes at a snail’s pace, and I’ve a long way to go. So far, I’m at 37 units.

I’m not always successful in my injections. The pen is large, and my hands are small, so when I push the plunger, I don’t always push it far enough so that it clicks and stays in place. It always makes me feel anxious when I fail. I try to remember everything, so that I’m successful with my dosage, but it’s difficult. The pen is rather ungainly, but I’ll get more comfortable and successful with use. I have Januvia for back up.

There is something I want to discuss with my doctor next week. According to the Lantus site, I should be doing injections ALONG WITH Januvia. I wonder why she wants me to do the Lantus alone? And why does the Lantus website say that their insulin should not be taken alone. It’s very confusing. I’ll let you know what I find out.

I trust my doctor. She has shown that she cares, and she is very knowledgeable. We do have one issue, however. She is Dutch, from the Netherlands, practicing here in the United States. I think we may have a cultural and language barrier. She is a “less is more” kind of doctor. As a result, my treatments often crawl along s-l-o-w-l-yyyy.

When it comes to my asthma, and I have an attack, I get an immediate secondary infection, which requires a strong antibiotic, and I must be on it for two weeks. That’s required. I have an asthma doctor. Thank God. But, if he’s out of town, I have to go to my regular doctor, and, by golly, she just can’t wait to under-treat my infection. However, in all other areas, she is superb, and we have a good relationship.

I know it’s hard to be a diabetic. It’s hard to try and try to lose weight and eat right. It often feels like one step forward and two steps back. Often we feel insulted and misunderstood. We see on the news, and read on websites and papers that we are responsible for our disease. They tell us that we are gluttons; that we sit around on our rear-ends and do nothing but fill our faces with fattening foods, as we live with our brains inside the TV.

It is a lie. It’s a mantra. Something that if they repeat it enough it will keep them from coming down with the fat person’s disease. They are living by an accepted conclusion, based upon their own bigotry.

Just recently I did some research on the causes of diabetes, and I came across a study which related Type 2 diabetes to a group of genes which influence insulin and glucose regulation. Read it for yourself. Skip over the big words and symbols, and absorb the meaning of this new study. Perhaps Type 2 diabetes is caused by a dysfunction of our genes. Here is the link: http://www.nih.gov/news/health/jan2010/niddk-17.htm

The genetic link in my family is unmistakable. Both of my grandmothers had Type 2 diabetes, along with my father, my mother, and my brother. Some genetic link, don’t you think? Do not forget to laugh about the ludicrous, and allow yourself to be angry about the insulting stuff, but don’t let it rule your life or who you truly are. You are a rare and precious human being, someone whom God cares about and loves.

My daughter just reminded me of a poem that I wrote years ago, which teaches me again and again to fight every battle “just for today,” and when that day is over, set it aside and forget it.

Just for Today by Jaye Lewis

Lord, just for today I will not fight You,
Nor anticipate Your desires for me.
Just for today, I will be happy
Doing Your will, instead of my own.

Just for today, I will laugh more, and complain less.
Just for today, I will not only count, But 'see' my blessings.
I will remember that home is 'heart,' And not 'hearth.'

Just for today, I will not belittle myself;
Goodness knows, there are plenty of others to do that for me.
Just for today, I will remember that I am a child of God,
And that in belittling myself, I belittle the One who made me.

Just for today, I will remember that You are, not only, with me;
But that You are holding me close.
Just for today, I will feel special to myself;
And I will love me, even as You have loved me.

Just for today, the only person I will rescue is myself.
I will not try to save the world, just for today.

Just for today, I will feel peace,
Knowing that there is Someone greater than I
To deal with my problems.

Just for today, I will allow You to be God.
I will be Your reflection.
I will not try to create You, in my image.

Just for today, I will cease to block Your love,
And I will allow the passion within me,
To embrace the lover of my soul.

Just for today, I will remember the little child within me.
Just for today, I will take the child out to play.

Just for today, I will have hope in You,
And in my ability to do Your will.
Just for today, I will let You be in control.
I will let You know more than I.
I will let You be in charge of my troubles.
Just for today, I won't have any.

Just for today, I will not hate.
Just for today, I will forgive the one who hurt me.
Just for today, I will ask God to forgive me.
Just for today, I will let Him.

© Jaye Lewis, 1994

Wishing you a happy Easter!

With love,
Jaye Lewis